YOU ARE THE CHRISTMAS HOLLY THORN IN MY SIDE

TENSION BETWEEN US

AS SOON AS ONE OR THE OTHER

 ENTERS THE ROOM

ENTERS THE ROOM

PREPARE FOR THE BOOM

AN OPPOSITE TUNE

OFF-KEY WHEN COMPARED TO YOUR BEAUTIFUL VOICE

IV'E TRIED TO GET ALONE

IV'E TRIED TO GET ALONE

YET IT SEEMS THERE'S  NO CHOICE

WEARE FOUND OPPOSITES

OPPOSITES

IN AN MULTITUDE OF WAYS

MAINTAIN PEACE MAINTAIN COMPOSURE

ABOVE ALL I PRAY

ADDITIONAL SECURITY CONSIDERATION OF  PAY

WAIT PER MY PURSE

SMALL CONTAINER OF PEPPER SPRAY

YOU ARE THE EPITOME OF WALKING LIVING TOOTH DECAY

MY DISLIKE FOR YOU PER MY FACE

100% ON DISPLAY

YOU BE YOU ARE

MY THORN MY THORN

MY PRICKLY PRICKLY PEICE  IN LIFE

PRETTY PICTURE BEAUTIFUL FLOWER

BUT TOUCH ME TRY TO HANDLE ME

MORE THAN YOUR FINGER WILL I SPLICE

YOU BE YOU ARE

MY THORN MY THORN

MY PRICKLY PRICKLY PEICE IN LIFE

PRETTY PICTURE BEAUTIFUL FLOWER

BUT TOUCH ME TRY TO HANDLE ME

MORE THAN YOUR FINGER WILL I SPLICE

Wilbert Walker Jr.

December 17, 2014

WE GOT TO BUY A GUN

WE GOTTA BUY A GUN

BECAUSE THERE'S A WAR AHEAD

STORE IT NEAR THE BED

THINK OF ALL YOUV'E READ

WE GOTTA BUY A GUN

SOCIETY FULL OF HATE

NOT ENOUGH SECURITY GATE

BEFORE IT'S TOO LATE

WE GOTTA BUY A GUN

FIRST ADMENDMENT RIGHTS

HEY IT ALL SOUNDS NICE

BUT SECOND CIVIL WAR IN THIS COUNTRY PENDING

TOWARD RACIAL DIVIDE THERE IS NO MENDING

GODDWILL OF ALL PEOPLE YOU CANT BE DEPENDING

PEACEFUL WALK THAT I BEGAN TO PARTAKE I'M SUSPENDING

THE CLOUDS OVER THIS COUNTRY GROWING DARK

THING OF THE PAST THE HAPPY CHIRPING OF THE SONGBIRD LARK

ALL BAD THINGS IN THE NEWS THE REALITY STARK

NO SUPERHERO TO PHONEBOOTH LIKE KENT CLARKE

WE GOTTA BUY A GUN

AND ACTIVELY LEARN TO USE IT

LIKE THE OTHER SIDE PROBABLY ABUSE IT

BUT ALL IN THE ACT OF DEFENDING MYSELF

STAND YOUR GROUND AGAINST THE AUTHORITIES NO OTHER HELP

A SYSTEM CANNOT FAIL IT WAS NEVER DESIGNED TO PROTECT

ARGUMENTS /OPINIONS SET FORTH BY THE MAJORITY AND RULING PARTY

I CHOOSE TO REJECT.

BUT MY OWN BY FORCE I WILL PROTECT

WE GOTTA BUY A GUN

SOCIETY FULL OF HATE

NOT ENOUGH SECURITY GATE

BEFORE IT'S TOO LATE

WE GOTTTA BUY A GUN

10 REASONS TO GET EATEN ALIVE BY A SNAKE

(10)..     CAR BROKE DOWN OVERNIGHT ON I-95 NEAR SANTEE
            -COOPER          LAKE.  SOUTH CAROLINA.

               THOSE SNAKES DOWN THERE ARE JUST MAN EATERS PERIOD

(9).         TO PROVE YOUR FAITH TO AND  IN THE BAPTIST CHURCH

(8).          TO IMPRESS KERRI WASHINGTON

(7).           TO REFERENCE FIRST HAND FOR YOUR SCREENPLAY

                  FOR NEXT JAMES BOND MOVIE "SNAKE FINGER" 

(6).           WENT OVERBOARD TRYING TO MIMMIC JAKE THE SNAKE     

                 THE WWE WRESTLER AND HIS INEVITABLE RETURN

(5).            MAYBE CHRIS ANGEL WILL TAKE NOTE AND HIRE ME.

(4).            I WAS GONNA USE THAT HOSE TO WASH MY CAR, IT MOVED

                  QUICKLY AND CONSUMED ME 

(3).            I THOUGHT SOMEBODY HAD THROWN OUT A GIGANTIC POLISH

                  SMOKED SAUSAGE

(2).             EVER HAVE A BODY PART REBEL AND TURN ON YOU?????        

(1).            MTV PROGRAMMING AINT WHAT IT USED TO BE....VH1 WILL DO

                  ANYTHING FOR RATINGS

(1B).          IF YOU BELIEVE THE PROPAGANDA OF A SNAKE NETWORK,

                   BEING EATEN IS THE NEXT STEP

GOLF BALLS TALKING

GOLF BALLS TALK TO EACH OHER...YES THEY DO!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

THE HUNT FOR BASEBALL OCTOBER

WE KNEW THAT BASEBALL WAS OUT THERE SOMEWWHERE. THE QUESTION WS AS TO WHERE IT COULD BE FOUND. MLB HAD  STRUCK A DEAL WHERE-IN THE PLAYOFFS WERE SPREAD THROUGHOUT THE 500 CHANNEL CABLE ENVIRONMENT.  COU;LD GAMES BE FOUND ON TBS, TNT, ESPN, FOX NEWS, FOX SPORTS ONE, NBC SPORTS CHANNEL, THE COURTROOM CHANNEL, BET OR WHERE??


PROCESS OF ELIMINATION QUICKLY  X ED OFF BET FROM THE LIST.
BUT MAYBE THE CARTOON NETWORK WAS A POSSIBILITY. MAYBE MLB WAS TOSSING US A HALLOWEEN JOKE. HALLOWEEN IN MIND, MAYBE SYFI WOULD HAVE THE GAMES.  SINCE OLBERMANN LOVES BASEBALL MAYBE MSNBC WOULD HAVETHE GAMES. BUT OH, THEY CANNED 'T THERE.SO THEY WERE ELIMINATED.


THOUGHT ABOUT NAKED AND AFRAID, BASEBALL WITH ALL THE RULES CHANGE, NUDITY PLAYING PROBABLY WAS CONSIDERED, SO MAYBE GAMES WERE ON THE DISCOVERY CHANNEL. THEN, WITH THE WASHINGTON SENATORS, NO NATIONALS BEING IN THE PLAYOFF S, MAYBE C-SPAN HAD THE GAMES.  BASEBVALL BEING THE ULTIMATE FAMILY GAME, THOUGHT THAT MAYBE PAT ROBESON HAD ENDORSED THE GAMES AND THEY WERE ON ABC FAMILY, NO THEY WERE NOT THERE. WITH THE HIGH NUMBER OF LATINA PLAYERS, THOUGHT THAT MAYBE THEY WERE ON TELEMUNDO WITH AN ENGLISH CAPTION AT THE BOTTOM BUT NO THE GAMES WERE NOT
 THERE.


FINALLY ASKED MYSELF, WHAT WOULD BUD SELIG THINK, WHAT WOULD HIS STRATEGY BE IN THE SCHEDULING OF GAMES.
THOUGHT THAT IN ORDER TO CATCH THE FEMALE FAN, HE MIGHT PUT THE GAMES ON THE SHOPPING CHANNELS.
TRIED QVC, HSN, SHOP NBC, NO GAMES THERE.
BEING PATRIOTIC, MAYBE THE MILITARY CHANNEL, NO NOT THERE.


DIDN'T CONSIDER HBO, BASEBALL AND BRYANT GUMBEL ON THE SAME NETWORK WOULD BE TOO BIG A REACH.


SO  MY LAST RESORT, LIKE MOST PEOPLE WAS TBN. IF IT WASN'T THERE THEN MAYBE GOD WAS NOT SMILING ON BASEBALL.
THEN I THOUGHT OF THE TEN DISNEY CHANNELS IN HONOR OF THE MOVIE I ENJOYED AS A KID "ANGELS IN THE OUTFIELD".


DREW A BLANK WITH DISNEY AND TBN.


IN MY CASE, THE HUNT FOR BASEBALL OCTOBER CAME BACK EMPTY.


DINO COSTA....WHERE HAVE YOU GONE????

NFL STADIUM SIGNS WEEK FIVE

BUFFALO BILLS
MANUEL OFFENSE STUCK???
ORTONMATIC GAME SHIFT




MINNESOTA VIKINGS
MOSES PARTED
TEDDY
BRIDGES THE WATER




TENNESEE TITANS
  OR
TENNESEE TOBACCO PLUG???


TAMPA BAY BUCS
MIKE GLENNON
QB WINNING


ATLANTA FALCONS
HOME DEPOT OUTSIDE
TOILETS SOLD HERE


CAROLINA PANTHERS
DISMAL DECLAWED DEFENSE


WASHINGTON REDSKIN
WON'T U COME HOME RGIII????


BALTIMORE RAVENS
FOLLOW THE BUZZARDS!!!!


JACKSONVILLE JAGUARS
JAGUARS OR JELLYBEANS???


MIAMI DOLPHINS
TANNEYHILL EQUALS WINS AND YIELDS


NEW ORLEANS SAINTS
RYAN'S DEFENSE DERAILED


HOUSTON TEXANS
JJ WATT ON HIGH BEAM ALL GAME LONG


DALLAS COWBOYS
AMERICA: TAKE BACK YOUR FOOTBALL TEAM


ARIZONA CARDINALS
IGNORE US IF YOU DARE!!!!!


SAN DIEGO CHARGERS
RIVER'S RUNNING RABID!!!


OAKLAND RAIDERS
COMMITTMENT TO LOSING


SAN FRANCISCO 49 ERS
I LEFT MY HEART WITH KAPERNICK


SEATTLE SEAHAWKS
SALMON SAYS


DENVER BRONCOS
PAYTON PLACE PIZZA THROW


CHICAGO BEARS
LOSING LIKE THE AVERAGE BEAR


CINCINATTI BENGALS
STRIPES OF A WINNING BIG CAT


DETROIT LIONS
BUILT STAFFORD TOUGH!!!


NEW YORK GIANTS
WINNING WITH GUSTO


NEW YORK JETS
REPROGRAM THE TAPE IN THE BLACK BOX


PHILADELPHIA EAGLES
LOSING AT THE SPEED OF LIGHT


ST. LOUIS RAMS
IS THERE A QUARTERBACK OUT THERE????


NEW ENGLAND PATRIOTS
WON'T YOU THROW LONG TOM BRADY????

MILEY CYRUS: PROVOCATIVE PHOTOSHOOT???

  PER PAGE SIX, AND THE QUESTION AS TO WHETHER THE PHOTOSHOOT
 
   WAS TOO MUCH, OR JUST YOUR TYPICAL BEAUTIFUL LADY POSING,


    I SAY THAT WE SHOULD POLL THE PARTICIPANTS IN THE SPECIFIC SHOOT AND TAKE IT FROM THERE:


(1).  LION'S HEAD, UPPER RIGHT IS POINTED AWAY NOT WATCHING HER.
        SEEMS UNINTERESTED.  THAT'S A NON PROVOCATIVE VOTE


(2).   THE TAIL OF THE ANIMAL, BOTTOM RIGHT, IS AT REST. THAT IS
         INTERPRETED AS A VOTE FOR NON PROVOCATIVE


(3).    THE POSITION OF MS. CYRUS BIG TOE, RIGHT FOOT WOULD SET OFF
           AN ALARM... THAT PROVOCATIVE


(4).     THE SMALLER PUPPU CREATURE, BOTTOM RIGHT, IS AT REST.
            NON PROVOCATIVE


(5).     THE ALLIGATOR CREATURE, TOP CENTER, IS AROUSED. 
            PROVOCATIVE


(6).     THE SMALL PUPPY HEAD SEEMS TO BE SORTA LOOKING
            SUSPICIOUSLY, SETS OFF AN ALARM


(7).      THE LEPOARD CAT WHEREIN REST MS. CYRUS LEFT FOOT DOESN'T
            SEEM TO CARE THE LEAST, THUS, NONPROVOCATIVE.


(8).      SHEEP HEAD FIGURE LOCATED BETWIXT MS. CYRUS FEET SEEMS
            TO BE LOOKING IN THE OPPOSITE DIRECTION. NOT AROUSED AT
             ALL.


(9).     MR. TORTOISE/MR. TURTLE, PER THE CENTER POSITION SEEMS TO
           HAVE A HAPPY EYE ON MS. CYRUS. THIS SETS OFF AN ALARM
           DANGER WILL ROBINSON!!!!!...PROVOCATIVE


(10).    THE DUCK HEAD ANIMAL LOCATED IN CLOSE, EXTREMELY CLOSE
             PROXIMITY TO MKS. CYRUS SEEMS TO BE SOUND ASLEEP. NOT
             AROUSED AT ALL


              FINAL TALLY:   AROUSED   4      NON AROUSED    6
          
             IN TOTALITY, THE PARTICIPANTS WOULD SAY THE PHOTO
             IS SAFE AND NONPROVOCATIVE.

NFL STADIUM SIGNS WEEK TWO

 POTENTIAL STADIUM SIGNS FOR WEEK TWO:


(1).ROGER GOODELL SMUDGER OF SHIELD

 (2). IGNORANCE OF MAIL DELIVERY IS NO EXCUSE

 (3). 2WEEKS OF LAWYER TALK. THANKS A LOT ROGER

 (4). SUSPEND THYSELF ROGER

 (5).  TO THE BATCAVE BATMAN.TO THE MAILROOM ROGER

 (6). IS AN NFL SEASON GOING ON OR IS THAT A LAWYER IN YOUR POCKET???

 (7).   RICE A WRONG I THE ROGER GOODELL TREAT

 (8) GiVE ME LIBERTY
OR GIVE ME NFL FRONTOFFICE DRAMA

(9).  ROGER ROGER DID YOU LOOK AT COPY OVER?

(10).   $ 42,000,000 CAN'T BUY YOU LOVE 

 

JOAN RIVERS TRIBUTE: EXIT THE FUNNY LADY

THE FUNNY LADY
EXITS'
THE STAGE


SUDDEN
HEAD TURN
A BACKWARD GAZE


APPEARANCE FEE
SLIGHTLY ABOVE
MI NIMUM WAGE


THE FUNNY LADY
EXITS
THE STAGE


STINGING SATIRE
SLIGHTLY GAUDEY
ATTIRE
PART OF
THE ACT


AUDIENCE FEEDBACK
LETS YOU KNOW
IF YOUR'E ON
THE RIGHT TRACT


POLITICAL SATIRE
NOT 100% FACTUAL
HEY ITS HUMOR
WHY CHECK THE FACTS


OVER TIME
HEALTH DOTH
EVOLVE


MAINTENANCE
REQUIRED
PER THE CRACKS


THE "PUNCH"
SHE STILL HAS IT
ACIDIC WIT


TOUCHY SUBJECTS
THEY SAY
FORBIDDEN
SHE JUMPS
IN THE
DITCH


THE MASSES
RESPOND
BUT NOW
THAT YOUR'E
GONE


IS THERE ANOTHER
IN LINE
TO THROW
AUDIENCE
A BONE


OFFER CRITIQUE
OF
CELEBRITY WEAR
HEIGHT OF
THEIR
STARDOM
U DON'T
SEEM TO CARE


FASHION HICCUP
OTHERS DON'T NOTICE
U PUBLICLY
LAY BARE


ALL DISTRIBUTED WITH
HUMOR
PERMEATING THE AIR


FOR PROVIDING
SOURCE OF
LAUGHTER
A SUBSTANIAL
FEE
IS DUE


THROUGH
SMILE
LAUGH
CONSIDERATION


THE CROWD
GAVE FEEDBACK
AUTHENTICATION


THAT YOUR
TALENT
YOUR GIFT
WAS TRUE


THAT YOUR
TALENT
YOUR GIFT
WAS TRUE


THE FUNNY LADY
EXITS'
THE STAGE


SUDDEN
HEAD TURN
A BACKWARD GAZE


APPEARANCE FEE
SLIGHTLY ABOVE
MI NIMUM WAGE


THE FUNNY LADY
EXITS
THE STAGE

10 REASONS MICHAEL STRAHAN AND MS. MURPHY CALLED IT QUITS

1. Strahan took the term Fox literally.

2.  VH1 SHOW NEEDED RATINGS UPTICK. This will do it

3.   No way to reach dirty dozen. Per kids. 5t4=9

4.   Murphy considered STRAHANS  $100,000 pledge to college band to be " NUTTY".

5,  Strahan refused Murphy's request to fill in his power facial  dental gap.

6.  Murphy figured out native meaning of his last name (stray hand).

7. STRAHAN ASKED FOR 3 YEAR EXTENSION OF ENGAGEMENT

8.  Murphy. Is smitten  on west coast with a Beverly hills cop.

9.  Strahan Told Murphy of his pro wrestling aspirations.

10.   R Kelly's ex ring was bigger than Murphy's and Strahan did not respond in kind.

11. The Murphy boat simply had enough Power to float away from the tugboat Strahan.

12.   Seven year engagements. Felt like "LIFE'.

13,  they went to therapy to save relation ship but 'DOCTOR COULD DO LITTLE"
14. Murphy. Tired of cROSS country trips to NYC which she called "HARLEM NIGHTS"

15' MURPHY REALIZED THAT IF STRAHAN GOT GOLD Caps on his teeth he would look like NORBIT.

16. In relation to 15, Strahan. Could potentially fall victim to "THE HEIST".

 17, with added MORNING duties Strahan was 'COMING TO AMERICA"

18. Often they wouldn't communicate over a" 48 HOURS" timespan

19, Strahan asked Murphy to consider his situation by "TRADING PLACES" and looking at things from a different perspective..

20.  With new found fame Murphy. Felt that america had crowned Strahan "THE GOLDEN CHILD"..

21, last few conversations amongst the two had been less than "A THOUSAND WORDS"..

22. Strahan knew he was in trouble when he inquired concerning her favorite James bond movie and Murphy responded "BOWFINGER".

23,  Murphy felt that after 7 Years problems. Wouldn't subside but only "BOOMERANG".

10 REASONS CAM NEWTON WILL HAVE A TERRIBLE YEAR

(10).  JR. EARNHARDT FINALLY WON A RACE


(9).   CHARLOTTE HORNETS FINALLY ARE A GOOD TEAM, AND
        CHARLOTTE CAN'T HANDLE TWO WINNING TEAMS
        AT THE SAME TIME


(8).   STEVE SMITH ISN'T AVAILABLE TO DISPLAY HIS LEADERSHIP
         SKILLS


(7).   HARDEE'S HAMBURGERS ARE FINALLY BETTER THAN MCDONALDS


(6).   FIRST THE MAYOR, THEN THE QUARTERBACK IT'S
         INEVITABLE


(5).   A. J.CARRON AND HIS GIRLFRIEND WOULD LOOK GREAT
         IN CHARLOTTE


(4).    SUPERBOWL WILL GO TO COLUMBIA BEFORE ITS HELD IN
          CHARLOTTE


(3).   FIG NEWTONS ARE OVERHYPED AS GOOD COOKIES


(2).   SUPERBOWL TROPHY IS MAD OF KYRPTONITE


(1).   RUSH LIMBAUGH IN GENERAL IS A PROPHET

AARON RODGERS: PLAY CALLING: YOUR NAME AT THE LINE OF SCRIMMAGE

AARON RODGERS : PLAY CALLING: YOUR NAME AT THE LINE OF SCRIMMAGE

  WHAT WOULD YOU DO IF AARON RODGERS CALLED OUT YOUR NAME IN HIS CADENCE AT THE LINE OF SCRIMMAGE?????

LET'S SAY THE PLAY WOULD BE:

LAWRENCE WHITE....LAWRENCE WHITE......BASEBALL....SHUFFLE...47....HUT...HUT

WHAT WOULD BE YOUR REACTION?????

BETTER YET....WHAT WOULD BE THE OUTCOME OF THE PLAY?????

WE CAN TELL YOU THE RESULT.

FEE OF $1.OO PER PLAY AT PAYPAL ACCOUNT: superclutch7@hotmail.com

CONTACT US AT:  superclutch7@hotmail.com
 WITH YOUR RETURN E-MAIL OR TEXT MESSAGE ADDRESS